To respond or react, that is the question. How you answer that may have bigger consequences for your life than you might even be aware of.

When someone behaves a certain way towards you, how you respond is always under your control.

But if instead you react, you are no longer in control of yourself. Your reactions are now being controlled by the other person or the external situation and/or your emotions are in control. And yet YOU have to live with the consequences of your reactions (that you did not consciously choose).

In order to make the switch to responding versus reacting, you first have to know that…

👉 you are not your emotions 👈

Sure, emotions are perfectly natural. If they didn’t come up, you would not be human.

But you are not your emotions and they are not you. Scientifically speaking, your emotions are just feelings in the body caused by your brain releasing chemical signals.

Who you are is the energy behind the emotions. You are the conscious decision-maker behind the feelings.

When you choose respond, you make a mindful decision based on how you choose to live your life.

Responses are not able to be controlled by others, nor your emotions.

Responses are more aligned with who you actually are because they are mindful versus reactive.

In order to respond versus react, you need to take a pause and observe what is actually happening in that moment, regardless of how high emotions may or may not be running.

Observe your emotions, observe the other person’s behaviors, and consciously choose a response that’s in line with how you want to live your life.

It could just take a few seconds for you to feel comfortable responding, or you may need to remove yourself from the situation and take a longer pause.

But ultimately it’s still your choice to react and be controlled, or respond mindfully and live your life how you choose to live it.

If you want to live a life you love, you need to love the choices that you make.